Saturday, June 18, 2016

Kids Will Always Want to Know Their Roots

I have one more thing I'd like to say today.  This is something I can speak of, from first hand experience, and it doesn't pertain just to same sex couples, but to anyone raising a child not made from them, or grown within them.

I am an adoptee.  Within my life, like the saying goes, like a moth to a flame, I found myself surrounded by adoptees.  We would inherently flock to one another.  Fate, maybe, coincidence, definitely not.  Like I've said in other posts, energy is everything. 

What I want to talk about are all the children being born now, via surrogate, and sent to live with either same sex couples, or heterosexual couples.  I'm 40. In m generation it was mostly regular adopted kids I knew.  By "regular," I mean, usually we were children born of children who could not keep us. And I can assure you, no matter how much love or money we were given, just about all of the girls and some of the boys I knew, always wanted to find their birth mother's.  We all felt as if something was missing, a piece of us, unknown. Because it was. 

I found both of my birth parents after I turned 30.  When I found my birth father, I found out that he and his college girlfriend MADE a baby specifically for two of their professors that they loved and knew couldn't have children.  This is my younger sister.  She was loved, but never told that she was adopted.  She found out in her early teens, that she was made to be given away and she, like me, had a similar path from then on; had two kids of her own, succumbed to a drug addiction -though is sober and doing great now. 

My point is this, we are going to have an onslaught of children who are feeling lost, like they don't belong, like something is missing.  I know from finding my own parents, and also from watching my own children grow up that genetics are real.  All of these are such important factors in rearing kids.  It's a difficult journey just being a "regular" adopted kid being raised by heterosexual parents.  Add into that factor the idea the kids today are going to grow up knowing, i.e.: that some woman "cooked" them inside of her for money.  The thoughts of, were they loved while in that woman's womb, will be wondered.  Does she think about me, will be wondered.  And if these questions aren't pondered, I fear even more!

I don't think people have given much thought to their actions.  My generation, we were lucky to be born, considering Roe v Wade, selflessness by our birth mothers played far more of a role. Unlike now, where I definitely feel that selfishness has prevailed, and it's an absolute that the future generation will pay the price for it. 

There, I've said what I've wanted to. 

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